never ask myself that question since I on my side don’t find that I have any
issues on that particular subject. But lately I’ve found myself wondering what
friendship means to people in general...
To me it’s natural that friendship is respect and love – but what does that mean? To me it’s the little things, like if I’m late, I’ll let you know; if you ask anything, I’ll answer; if you need something and I can give it to you, I’ll give it to you, and if I cannot give it to you, I’ll tell you. It’s honesty in all aspects and at all levels. Making sure you’re all right, showing an interest in you as a person and your life in general. Giving you attention and affection because I want to – to me that’s how I (at least try to) show you guys that you’re my friends.
It’s also a matter of listening. Not all of you say things as straight forward as I tend to. And maybe that’s good!! Being your friend I – hope – that I can read you so well, that if something is wrong and you’re not telling me about it I can still feel that something needs to be “dragged” out of you. And again respect to me is that I only do it if I feel that you are ready to talk about whatever it might be and that I don’t push you....
I know that I tend to give a lot and sometimes I feel that I need to tell you that you should not give back the same amount of attention to me as I give to you – simply because I know I tend to be a little over the top now and again. To me it’s a part of, who I am – I need to give a lot, or put in other words, I cannot help it. Or as Audrey Hepburn put it: “I was born with an enormous need of affection and a terrible need to give” – when I give something, the mere action of giving it is important and just seeing the reaction is something I thrive on. The affection I get from you by you being in my life is in itself amazing. On the other hand, I’m also aware that sometimes I’m just too much – not everyone can handle the amount of attention and affection I often give, and my personal challenge is to notice if I’m giving too much. It’s not always easy since I only do it out of an honest and lovong heart, but I try to use my intuition and hold back when I feel that’s the proper thing to do.
And then I find myself wondering, why it is that when a friendship changes into a relationship between lovers, some people tend to change how they treat each other. As if, you have higher expectations to your partner than to your friends! I know it, because I’ve been there..... I hope that by now I’ve become better at giving my partner as much space and respect as I give you friends.
I try to give my friends a lot of space and although it can also mean leaving you alone sometimes (and I find that difficult since I want to make sure you’re OK!), I still hope you feel that if I don’t send you a lot of text messages or call you it is not because I don’t care, but often because I sense that you need the space.
And I hope you know that no matter what you need and when, I’m here for you always. If I can, I will help you, no matter what. I’ve always thrived on giving – previously I’ve been too much of a pleaser not taking my own needs and feelings into consideration, but I feel I’ve become much better to listen to what I need and not ignore it when giving.
At the end of the day, the most important thing to me is still that we remember to show the people around us that we care and not use any excuses to postpone it – no one knows what tomorrow will bring, but living in the present and making the best of it is a good start
Let that be the last of my scrabbling for now. I’m right here, right now and will be here always.
All my love!